Recognize

All winter my reflection was of a sick person. Very pale skin, dark circles under my eyes, bald head, no eyebrows, joint and nerve pain, fatigue…I was very sick. Chemotherapy was a difficult process and it was hard for me to accept that I was not well. I really disconnected from my reflection. I don't look in the mirror very closely for a few months. Inside I didn't feel like a “sick person”. I felt Nicole. I also didn't want to be reminded with every glance in the mirror of everything I was going through, so I just didn't look.

I was washing my face and as I dried I took a long look into the mirror and I was surprised. I recognized the person looking back at me!! It was like seeing an old friend again. Hello friend! I finished my treatments mid April and I have been steadily feeling better every day. My hair is growing back including my eyebrows. My stamina has increased. I am strong enough to go to the gym a few times a week and I started Bikram yoga again.

I never knew how good my life was until I experienced cancer. I never knew how much I was loved until life got hard and I was surrounded and supported. I never knew how strong my body was until it performed like it is designed to under immense stress. I never appreciated how I look and feel on an everyday basis until it was taken away from me.

I recognize all these things now. I appreciate so much more. I like what I see when I look in the mirror and when I take stock of my life. I am blessed and God, please forgive me when I get ungrateful because I don't mean it!

Today I recognize the power of the Universe.
I recognize the laws of attraction.
I recognize and love myself.
So it is.